Fun Conversations You Can Have When You're a Teacher

The other day, I thought one of my kids had snuck off to the bathroom to get high, and I didn't have time to check it out. I picked out a student that I knew was honest but probably had been to a party or two. "Hey," I asked him, "do you know what pot smells like?"

He froze. It was the funniest thing I had seen in a long time, watching those gears grind: Why is he asking me? Do I look stoned? No, I'm not stoned. If I say yes, will he think I'm a stoner? Will he think I'm stoned? Oh, crap! Am I stoned? No, I'm not stoned. Am I in trouble?

"It's okay if you say yes," I say, as reassuringly as possible. "You're not in trouble."

He nods quickly, as if I had asked the most obvious question in the world.